Princess

After I pointed out that there were three boys in our living room trying to play the Little Mermaid Nintendo DS game by singing "Ahaha ahh ahh ahh", Chuck said, To be fair, my kid is watching a princess movie. (The boys picked Enchanted and were enthralled).

Vietnam

After my sister noticed that the kids had failed to pick up a pile of papers and asked, "I thought the kids cleaned this up.", Chuck said, Like the Vietnam War, they had the best of intentions in the beginning, but in the end it was all still just a big mess.

Kettle Drum

In response to George having a temper, Chuck said, He wailed on me like a kettle drum. I can't wait until he comes in the bedroom with matches and gasoline.

Punched

After falling asleep for a few minutes in our bed, Chuck flinched and punched me in the back. I said, "What was that?!" Chuck said (or mumbled), Sorry, I thought a basketball was flying at my face. And he rolled over without another word.

To be fair, he had gotten hit in the face with a basketball that day, but I certainly wasn't expecting him to punch me. Luckily it wasn't too hard.


And because I'm a huge fan of "that's what she said" jokes, I have to say after my last line, "That's not what she said."

Remorse

In response to his own suggestion that maybe he should show a little remorse, Chuck said, Just like me dating one of the Kardashians, some shit just ain't gonna happen.

He's Never Wrong

After Theresa won a bet as to whether a certain actor from the Bourne Supremacy was also the quarterback in the movie Valentine's Day, Chuck said, So that would make you right and me wrong.

For some reason, it never gets old to hear him admit that he's wrong.

Thin Mints

After opening a package of Girl Scout cookies for the kids, Chuck said, They ate those thin mints like it was a package of hamburger and a pack of wild dogs.